i'm blaming the fact that i've done a 3 hour mid-term exam this evening on why this is making me DIE of laughter right now. 

one full week later, and all i have to say is that i am gloomy mccrankystein.

(diatribe)

i'm tired, overworked, overtired, pallid, unmotivated and more tired.

it's just been a week of this, and i have worked 50+ hours while putting in time in the evening to be a full-time student.  and i am the optimist, the perseverance minded, the let's all band together person...

but i am pooped.

just being honest.

i feel like getting under the covers and staying there.

as seen on a bumper sticker affixed to the tv in the corner:

BEAVER LIQUORS
where the beer's colder than your wife's heart!

i'm officially in a small town in colorado.

engraved on the back of my ipod:

"this place totally plays the jams."

bitchin'.

* * * *

easter is near, and most years i just want to go to church to see if the pastor will change the story to freak everyone out.  like, "and on the the third day, jesus...hit the snooze alarm."

* * * *

post-stomach flu, i thought i really wanted cheetos.  turns out, i just wanted to lick the cheet off of the o, and put them back in the bag.  what's left is really weird looking, and then again, so is just licking off fake plastiscene cheese, and my bird flu is still affecting my general health -- so i opted out on this activity.

for now.

* * * *

i can either write a 3 page literary criticism paper really quickly, cutting corners, or i can take 9 days to do it, having read all of the material.  there is no in between for me.  also, there is no 9 days scenario either.  because, please.

* * * *

i still remember vocabulary words from my 4 years of german in high school, nearly 10 years ago.  so now, whenever i hear some of these words in english, my brain says them in german.  college is kollege (kul-leg-uh) and gymnasium is gim-nahs-ee-um (high school), and so forth.  the word for fruit is obst, so the host of survivor is jeff pr-fruit. 

* * * *

i can't take any more "nicknames" for being pregnant.  baby bump has got to be the worst, made more nauseating only by when they just call it "bump" as in "bump watch" and whathaveyou.  i also really don't enjoy preggers (visualization of eggs), prego (a big stomach full of spaghetti sauce), bun in the oven (sigh), or the snobby "with child".  i'm not making a judgement call if you like or use the words regularly.  except that we can't be friends anymore.  just kidding.

* * * *

it is beyond me how any kid who only has to go to college, and nothing else, flunks out.  ridiculous. it smacks of negligence and vodka.

* * * *

When a cat misbehaves you squirt a light mist of water in his face so he learns not to do something again. A societal equivalent would be so satisfying. When the girl at the coffee shop orders “a caramel frappucino with semi-dry foam,” you could just tap her on the nose with a rolled up magazine and say, “NO, Tiffany! Bad. NO.”

for my birthday, i got some very lovely presents, a new ipod, and the stomach flu.

this is a kristin staaland-specific post.

an art film about the popping of a zit.  i'm not kidding. an ART film.

i could not resist when i saw it.  the best is the enya-like soundtrack as the camera pans over skin that looks like the surface of some desolate planet, the sweeping build up until you watch scene after scene of middle-school mirror time memories flood back.

honest: i am totally disgusted and yet CAN'T LOOK AWAY.

all i kept hearing in my head was kristin's voice saying "i love the EXPLOSION!!!"

you've been warned.

i have my little coterie of blogs that i read, a little lattice of disparate subjects and interests that make up my little internet world.  not my whole world, mind you, but the one that is plugged in and distracts me from, say, writing an essay about the percentage of the voting population being adequate or not, and the japanese poet basho's narrow road to the interior.

one of these little corners of the world distraction web is written by mindy kaling, a writer/producer/actor in the office.  kelly kapoor has a blog.  this blog, in all of it's materialistic glory, is entitled

"things that i bought that i love". 

it's charming, it makes me laugh, it's about things that i would/could never afford and some that i can, it's cotton candy on a stick with a big pocket full of lick-em-stix:  in short, i love it.

so, as i talk about the things that i recommend, the list of things i have to do, what i have been reading, flotsam and jetsam, current events and things that are new but not news, i now include: things that i bought / own / received that i love.  edition one.

rocket dog shoes from dsw.  these were CHEAP as i got them on clearance and during extra bonus points days and with about three gift certificates.  i mean, they were still cheap without those things, but that made them, well, free.  dark corduroy green with some bright blue attitude, and a gold dog on the sole?  come on.  was hesitant at first, but now am in deep adore.  shown here with black leggings and my own porcelain (read: pasty & translucent) skin.

orchids in glass.  these particular kind are fire and ice orchids, and happened to be sent to me by the valedictorian of boyfriends himself, so of course i was going to love them.  when they got delivered at work, our receptionist said "i bet those are roses" and i answered "not if they are from my boyfriend, they're not."  a flower that can be modern and classic at the same time and smell really good?  yes.

black rose earrings.  from forever21, a store i have to take some valium to enter, and one in which i can only buy accessories usually.  dirt cheap, and got them in electric blue as well.  somewhere between your grandma's old jewelry and something retro cool, i like the break from the long dangly earrings.

mittens on a string.  the only way to wear mittens is with a long string connecting them through your coat.  my old ones were wearing out, and these were a lovely christmas present.  bright blue, a color you'd never really pick for yourself and which clashes with everything (including my orange scarf) makes me insist on wearing them all the time.

orange bird scarf (and blue toggle coat).  coat was on clearance, and i had the added entertainment of being able to watch this foreign lady in front of me shop lift a gift card (which won't work for her, but she doesn't know that) while purchasing cheap coat.  big enough to wear thick sweaters under without making you look 900 pounds.  i'd comment about the orange bird scarf, but what else needs to be said?  orange.  bird.  scarf. 

kate spade stationary.  old school writing, and more than just paper should cost, i could not help myself.  on the front, with brown grass, it says simply "the grass is always greener" with just a hedge of green grass on the back.  also featured is my favorite writing utensil of the moment, and highly recommended: le pen, in green.  you will write more letters this way.

*      *      *      *      *

i'm just now getting around to rifling through and posting pictures from the last few months.

this is what i like to call "what happens when parents have vacation time and a brand new camera".

the boy is a great sport.  so this, this is the night we went to prom.  or new years eve.  your pick.

i am totally procrastinating writing my short essay about spenser's the faerie queen.

can't deal with british poetry.

and not written in spenserian stanzas.

with careless y's and whilome's all scattered about like gum wrappers.

besides, i'm shopping online for clothes with birthday money.

who can do homework with that distraction?

faerie queen goes RIGHT on the craplist.

music:  i enjoyed arcade fire's first album, funeral, but had procrastinated (me?  really?) in listening to their second album.  i ended up having it on while trying to find my way to a mall in denver, and it pretty much found me.  i've gotten quite into it as of late.  particularly while sifting through emails in the morning.